


Sketch Your Dreams, Draw My Memories

by Balthamos



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: M/M, Reincarnation
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-11-21
Updated: 2012-11-25
Packaged: 2017-11-19 05:05:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,780
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/569422
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Balthamos/pseuds/Balthamos
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Merlin  thinks he is just an average art student, supplementing his loan by working shifts at the local coffee shop. One day he meets two people who are very interested in him, the pair they talk to him as if they're are old friends and proceed to introduce him to others who also seem to recognise him. From there things only get stranger...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Strange Encounter

Merlin was late, he picked up his pace as he only had two minutes to get to the coffee shop before his shift started. He pulled the cloth rag away from his face and tentatively touched his upper lip. Well at least the bleeding seemed to have stopped but his nose was still far too sore to hold his glasses, he would have to muddle through this shift blind. He sighed quietly, it was going to be a long day. He reached the small shop, but didn't dare risk going in the front in case the boss was in, unlikely as that was on a Saturday. Merlin walked the long way round to the back entrance only tripping over two bins and cursing to himself.

He entered the store room and pulled off his muddy football boots and t-shirt, pulling on his bright green uniform and comfy well-worn trainers. He entered the shop front, scanning the room he squinted, from what he could tell there were two customers sitting in the corner, chatting over their coffees. Merlin looked round and spotted the other barista Claire bending over the old coffee machine, trying to coax it back to life. Merlin did not want to disturb her as she was concentrating so he picked up a tray and began to wander round the shop, clearing the tables. He was glad he had missed the lunchtime rush, navigating the tables blind was tricky enough when the place was empty. The couple in the corner were deep in conversation, Merlin left them to it if they wanted anything they would ask. He precariously balanced the tray on one arm and moved the chairs back round a table with his free hand. He then made his way back to the counter but before he had made it three steps he tripped over a stool, he couldn't see. Naturally he went flying, the tray sliding across the floor in front of him, the cups and plates smashing. The couple at the table jumped, their intense conversation finishing abruptly. The woman rushed to help him.

"Ah shit" Merlin said sitting up feeling dazed.

Claire rushed round from behind the counter,

"Oh my goodness!" she breathed, she turned to the woman "It's ok thanks, I've got him"

The woman nodded and stepped back still watching them worriedly, the man touched her arm and she sat back down. The pair did not resume their conversation though, obviously more interested in the scene before them.

"Christ Merlin, you've obviously been taking extra clumsy pills today" she admonished, neither of them noticing the customers' reaction to the mention of Merlin's name.

Merlin scowled at Claire, he hated been called clumsy. When she reached for his nose he flinched away. She sighed and tutted,

"Clean yourself up, I'll sort this out" she said standing up.

"Thanks Claire" Merlin said gratefully.

Claire went over to the counter to get a broom. Merlin groaned and stretched before forcing himself to stand up, wobbling dangerously.

"Merlin?" said a man's voice.

Merlin squinted, he could tell the man was blonde and a little shorter than him but not much else. He didn't recognise the voice though.

"Um yeah," he replied before swaying again.

The mysterious man took his arm and led him to a chair.

"Sit down," he said gently

"Merlin it really is you," said a woman "What happened to your nose? That’s not from just now, did someone hit you?" she sounded concerned even though she didn't know him.

"Uh...no, who would hit me? I was playing quidditch in the park and my mate Mark threw a bludger at my face," he explained touching his nose gently and wincing.

"Quidditch?" the man asked curiously.

Merlin may not have had his glasses on but he could just about make out the man's shoulders shaking and he could hear the laughter in his voice.

"Yeah, muggle quidditch," he clarified "I play it in the park with some friends from Uni, it’s a laugh."

"You Merlin are quite the nerd," the man said smiling fondly at him.

Merlin didn't see this though,

"You got me," he said holding up his hands and laughing, "Who are you by the way? You're talking to me as if you know me. I'm sorry, I don't have my glasses and I can't really see. I don't recognise your voices though," he babbled.

"Merlin it's Arthur," was the man's response.

Merlin did not pick up on the confusion in Arthur's voice nor did he see him shake his head.

"It's nice to meet you Arthur," he said before turning to the woman.

"I'm Guinevere, Gwen," she said worriedly.

"Hello Gwen," Merlin replied smiling at the pair cheerfully.

"C'mon Merlin stop your gabbing and come do some work" came Claire's voice from the other side of the shop.

Merlin could tell she was joking.

"Aw Claire there's no one here and Eric won't be back for ages it's Saturday," he whined.

Claire laughed and went out to the stock room.

"You don't remember us?" Arthur asked him.

"No, should I?" Merlin replied, confused.

"I guess not, nevermind," Arthur said sounding resigned.

"Sorry," Merlin apologised although he was unsure why he did so, maybe it had something to do with the disappointment clear in Arthur's voice.

"It's alright Merlin, don't worry about it," Gwen said, "Look we'll be in this part of town all afternoon, maybe we could have a chat when you've finished your shift?" she asked carefully.

Merlin was a little confused, not to mention wary. Who were these people and why were they interested in him? They didn't exactly seem dangerous though, just a bit strange.

"Ok? I finish at five. Am I in trouble?" he asked.

"No," replied Arthur, "are you usually in trouble?"

"No," Merlin grinned.

The odd pair left after he promised to meet them later that day, Merlin watched them leave frowning a little. He couldn't put his finger on it but something about the couple seemed oddly familiar. He put the thought out of his mind as some new customers came in, smiling his cheery smile in welcome.

~

Outside the shop Arthur began to pace, trying to calm himself down.

"Arthur stop it!" Gwen ordered calmly.

"How can I Gwen? He doesn't remember, I finally found him after all this time and he doesn't fucking remember." Arthur shouted, "He doesn't remember me," he added quietly.

"Hush now, it'll be ok Arthur. We've found him and he's really well, surely that's what matters in the end?" she asked him.

"But I miss him Gwen, I miss him so much."

"I know, I know" she whispered taking his hand gently and leading him away from the coffee shop, "Let's call Morgana," she suggested.

"Ok, ok. I know you're right," he sighed rubbing his hand over his face.

They reached a bridge across the river and stopped, leaning on the barriers. Arthur stared at the stormy grey water thinking.

"Hmm? Right about what?" Gwen asked him.

"That I should just be happy he's ok and I am, truly I am. It's been such a worry just finding him but I just wish-"

"It'll all work out Arthur, I'm sure of it," she said trying to reassure him.

Arthur refused to meet her eyes, still gazing at the river below him.

"How can you know?" he asked.

"I don't but I have to hope," she explained.

Arthur nodded he understood but hope could be a terrible thing. He pushed of the barrier took Gwen's arm allowing her to take him to Morgana. Hopefully his sister would know what to do.


	2. A Very Odd Dinner Indeed

The rest of Merlin’s shift was rather uneventful and eventually five o’clock rolled around. He went out the back to change his t-shirt before saying goodbye to Eric and sneaking out of the front door. When he got outside he was surprised to find Gwen and Arthur standing waiting for him. He smiled at them nervously,

“Hi,” he said.

“Hello Merlin,” said Arthur, his tone fond.

“We were going to grab dinner with a friend and wondered if you would like to join us,” Gwen asked him.

“Um won’t that be a little weird? I don’t really know you,” Merlin protested.

“Nonsense Merlin, I want to hear all about this muggle quidditch and why you seem to think it’s worth a broken nose,” Arthur told him, “plus Morgana is desperate to meet you.”

“Morgana?” Merlin asked.

“My sister,” Arthur explained.

“Morgana, Guinevere, Arthur,” Merlin said slowly.

“Yes?” Arthur asked hopefully.

“Hmm, oh just unusual names that’s all.”

Arthur sighed, his shoulders slumping a little but he tried to stay upbeat.

“So dinner?” he said brightly

Merlin touched his nose gently, the swelling had gone down significantly but it was still too sore for his glasses.

“Um… I won’t be able to see, I still can’t wear my glasses,” he said.

“Ah don’t worry I’ll read you the menu. You’re quite blind I take it?” Arthur enquired.

“Yep, I can barely make out your faces,” he held his hand out waving into the distance “I can see far away things better,” he explained.

“Well how do you play a contact sport with glasses?”

They were walking in step now, Gwen trailing a little, happily listening to their chatter. Merlin rummaged around in his rucksack and pulled out a pair of leather strapped goggles, holding them out to Arthur.

“These go over my glasses,” he explained.

Arthur took the goggles observing them carefully,

“Clever. You never thought of getting contacts?” he asked.

“Nah, too itchy,” Merlin informed him.

“And I suppose you need the glasses to keep up your nerdy persona,” Arthur teased lightly.

“Ha! Ha! You blonde prat,” Merlin retorted.

“Four eyes,” Arthur shot back.

Gwen smiled to herself, how she had missed this, the bickering. Eventually they arrived at the restaurant which was a grand building, in quite a posh part of town. Merlin stopped dead in his tracks.

“Gwen,” he hissed, “I can’t eat here it’s too fancy and I don’t have any money, I’m a student remember?”

“Don’t worry dear, this is on us,” she clarified.

“Who are you people?” Merlin asked.

“All in good time,” said a woman behind him.

“Ah Morgana you’re here already, Merlin this is my sister Morgana. This is Merlin, I’m afraid he is blind today because he was hit in the face by a bludgeon.”

“A bludger,” Merlin corrected.

“Ah like in _Harry Potter_?” she enquired.

“Yeah I just play it in the park with some friends, its way more fun than football,” he told her.

Arthur snorted.

“I think it sounds very cool,” Morgana told him.

Merlin beamed at her.

“You would,” Arthur said rolling his eyes.

Their waiter came then and showed them to their table. Merlin sat down next to Arthur, facing Morgana. Arthur opened the menu and turned to him,

“So what do you fancy?” he asked

“A salad?” Merlin replied.

“Don’t be silly, it’s my treat so live a little how about steak or lobster? I bet you’ve never had lobster have you?” Arthur asked him.

“Urgh gross, I’m veggie. I don’t eat lobster or steak,” Merlin informed him.

“Of course you are,” Arthur said quietly.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Merlin asked.

He didn’t notice Morgana and Gwen look worriedly at each other.

“Oh you know, you always did hate hunting,” Arthur offered as explanation.

“What?” Merlin was confused.

“Uh… nothing forget it,” Arthur mumbled.

He was a little worried that he was having dinner with a nutcase, but Morgana and Gwen seemed fairly safe, he was sure they wouldn’t let Arthur kidnap him. Plus he was an impoverished student, he was never going to say no to a free meal. He ordered the mushroom tagliatelle at Arthur’s suggestion. He couldn’t see the prices which eased his guilt a little.

When everyone had ordered the conversation turned to Merlin’s life. He felt a little like he was being interviewed for a biography.

“So you’re a student Merlin? What do you study?” Morgana asked him.

“Fine Art,” he answered, “and some photography as well.”

“Ooh a budding artiste,” Morgana smiled. “How do you like London? You’re not local are you?”

“No I’m from Ewloe, in Wales,” he confirmed, “But London is great, it’s so busy and loud, but it’s expensive. I love it though.”

“I’m glad,” Gwen said “So how old are you, nineteen?”

“Eighteen,” Merlin corrected.

“Wow, eighteen,” Morgana repeated, looking at Arthur.

Merlin was a little confused by the tone of her voice. Arthur cleared his throat,

“So Art? I imagine you have quite a heavy workload,” Arthur asked taking a sip of his wine.

“Yeah it’s pretty intense, I don’t have a lot of timetabled contact time, but I’m in the studio every day,” Merlin explained.

“I see, and do you really have time to work at the coffee shop?” Arthur asked.

“Yeah, it’s a struggle at times but I mostly work evenings and weekends. I manage ok,” Merlin clarified.

“That sounds exhausting dear,” Gwen said worriedly.

“S’ok I don’t really need a lot of sleep, so I have loads of time really,” he replied.

“You need to sleep Merlin,” Morgana admonished.

“I’ll sleep when I’m dead,” Merlin joked.

“That’s a healthy attitude, Merlin,” Arthur said.

Merlin just shrugged absentmindedly, he was thinking. There was something so familiar about Arthur but he just couldn’t place it. He was only drawn out of his musings when the food arrived.

The group was quiet while they ate, Merlin’s food was delicious and probably very expensive he thought to himself. It didn’t stop him though he was starving after a long day. When everyone had finished the conversation turned to Merlin’s childhood

“What was it like growing up in Wales?” Gwen asked him.

“Pretty boring. No it was ok, just a bit on the quiet side. Nothing interesting ever happened really. In fact I think the most interesting thing that ever happened while I was there was when I had to be air lifted to hospital after I fell off a roof. I got to go in a helicopter, which was cool.” Merlin explained.

“Why were you on a roof?” Morgana asked.

“I was chasing after a cat,” he explained.

Arthur laughed out loud at this image of a young Merlin trying to catch a cat, completely oblivious to any danger. So typical Merlin.

“How is your mother?” he asked.

“She’s fine,” Merlin replied, “She still rings every day to make sure I get up and check that I’m eating. I think that she thinks I’ll forget to eat if she doesn’t remind me.” He moaned.

“Well you are awfully skinny,” Gwen said softly looking him over.

“Ah but that’s because I’m living on 8p noodles and cast-off vegetables from the market,” he explained.

Arthur and Morgana exchanged a worried look at this.

“Why?” Morgana asked, “Don’t you get a loan?”

“I may have overspent a little,” Merlin said sheepishly.

“On alcohol I suppose,” Arthur guessed shaking his head.

“No actually I bought a ukulele,” Merlin informed him.

“A ukulele,” Arthur repeated slowly, his tone disbelieving.

“What? They’re cool and way easier than the guitar. Me and Freya, my flatmate, are going to start our own ukulele cover band and put it on YouTube. It will be awesome, you’ll see.” Merlin told them.

“You have to be the nerdiest person ever,” Arthur laughed.

“Ah who cares, I’d rather be nerdy than boring any day.”

“Quite right. It suits you,” Arthur replied.

Arthur was doing it again, confusing him. Merlin looked to Gwen and Morgana but they had started their own conversation, clearly bored of talking about Merlin’s nerdiness. Merlin turned back to Arthur,

“You don’t _know_ me,” he reminded him

“No _you_ don’t know _me_ ,” Arthur responded quietly.

Morgana shot him a warning look, she had been listening to their whole conversation.

“Ok?” Merlin said raising his eyebrows.

He looked at his watch and was startled to see how much time had passed, it was ten o’clock.

“Crickey,” he said “It’s getting late.”

“Past your bedtime?” Arthur teased.

“Not even close, I never go to bed before three actually. But I have a half-finished canvas to complete tonight, as I’m working all day tomorrow.” He explained. “I think I ought to get going, but it was really nice to meet you all,” he said standing up.

“It was lovely to see you Merlin,” said Morgana.

“Yes it really was, we must do it again, you clearly need feeding or you’ll get scurvy,” Arthur joked.

“Arthur I live on vegetables,” Merlin argued.

“How about you join us for dinner in a couple of weeks? I think some of our friends would love to meet you.” Gwen informed him.

Merlin shook his head.

“I’m sorry but I really don’t know who you think I am, because I really don’t know you. I’m just a struggling artist, I’m no one special,” he told them crossly.

“Yes you are Merlin, you just don’t know it yet,” Arthur whispered.

Merlin sighed, this was starting to get really weird. He still gave Gwen his mobile number though, figuring it would be easier to fob her off over the phone, than if she turned up at the shop. After an argument over getting a taxi, which Merlin won after insisting he could get the tube just fine, he left the restaurant.

Morgana turned to Arthur,

“Slow it down a bit Arthur, you’re just confusing him at the moment.” She told him.

“But I want to help him remember,” Arthur argued.

“I’m sorry sweetie but I don’t think that is going to happen anytime soon,” she said sadly.

Arthur just clenched his fists, staring past her.

“We need to take this slowly Arthur, you need to give him space or you will freak him out. Let’s leave it a couple of weeks before we contact him again, ok?” she asked

Arthur didn’t respond.

“Ok Arthur?” she asked again.

“Fine.”

~

When Merlin got back to the flat Freya and Gilli were still up, chatting in the small kitchen. Merlin went in to get a drink and let them know he was still alive.

“Where have you been?” Freya asked him curiously.

“Weirdest dinner ever,” he replied.

Gilli raised an eyebrow, so Merlin explained his day,

“I met these really odd people at work and they insisted on taking me out to dinner. They seemed to think they knew me, which was ridiculous as I’d never met them before.”

For some reason neither Freya or Gilli seemed to think this was an odd turn of events.

“They were really posh Freya, where would I have met posh types,” he laughed.

“What were their names?” asked Gilli, who was clearly missing the point.

“Oh yeah get this, they were Arthur, Guinevere and Arthur’s sister Morgana. How weird is that?” he asked.

“Very,” Freya agreed carefully.

Merlin had his back to them now as he was at the sink, so he didn’t see them exchange a worried look. He turned round when his glass was full.

“Plus I almost broke my nose in the park today and I haven’t been able to see at all.” he moaned touching his nose for what felt like the hundredth time that day, “I think I may be able to get my glasses on now though,” he smiled.

“Can’t have you blind,” replied Gilli.

“I have way too much work on to be blind for any length of time,” Merlin agreed, “speaking of which I had better make a move,” he exited the kitchen, waving goodbye to his flatmates, and went to his room.

He was still thinking about the odd day, he was also wondering why Freya and Gilli had not been more surprised. He decided to text Will,

Hey Will, how’s home without me?

I have had the strangest day

Really what’s up, it’s raining

here but what else is new, :-)

Typical. Well I got invited to dinner

by some posh London types

Oh no! Are you sleeping around

for food now Merlin? What

would your poor mother say?

Ha! Ha! No seriously they

 were in the shop and they just

 invited me out. They kept

 acting like they knew me.

Oh and get this, their

 names were Arthur, Gwen

and Morgana

Oh that’s a bit odd, but

I’m sure they just thought

you were someone else

Yeah I guess

Plus you got a free meal right?

Yup ;-)

Yeah so don’t worry about it,

do your work, I am going to bed.

I’m knackered some of us have

real jobs

Ok goodnight and btw

I have a job too

You make coffee, I fix cars,

big difference, night xxx

Reassured Merlin set to his work. He presumed that that was the end of it and that the strange trio would realise their mistake. He probably wouldn’t hear from them again. How wrong he was…


	3. Recognition

Three weeks later and Merlin’s life was back to normal. He was rushed off his feet juggling several deadlines and his job at the coffee shop but he was managing. He didn’t even have time to think about the odd events of last month because he was simply too exhausted. He doubted that the unusual trio would contact him again once they’d realised their mistake, which was why he was surprised  to be woken up by his mobile ringing on a Saturday morning.

Merlin stared at the screen for a few moments, he didn’t recognise the number, groaning he accepted the call.

“’lo,” he grumbled yawning widely.

“Hello Merlin,” said a cheerful voice “It’s Gwen here from the other week, how are you?”

“Oh hello Gwen,” he mumbled “I’m ok I guess,” he yawned again, he was a little shocked that the woman was calling him.

“Am I interrupting something?” she asked worriedly.

“Yeah my sleep,” he muttered, Merlin was not a morning person.

“Oh my goodness, I’m sorry, you were sleeping, of course you were, you were probably up all night, I’m sorry,” she apologised.

“It’s ok,” he said guiltily, he hadn’t meant to be rude “time is it?”

“It’s nearly twelve,” Gwen informed him.

“Ah shit,” Merlin muttered rubbing his face.

He stood up and wandered over to the bathroom to splash his face. He towelled dry and picked up the phone again.

“Sorry Gwen,” he apologised, “It’s a good thing you rang, I have work in an hour, is something the matter by the way?”

“Oh well that’s lucky then, I was just ringing to ask if you would like to come dinner this evening?” she asked

“Oh well-”

“It’s just that my boyfriend Lance fancies himself a bit of a chef and he wants to make a vegetarian lasagne, which is perfect for you isn’t it?” she insisted.

“Yeah the thing is…” Merlin couldn’t think of an excuse, he was too tired and off guard, “Can I call you back?”

“Uh…ok,” Gwen replied quietly.

Merlin rang off, he was confused. On the one hand he had enjoyed his dinner with Gwen and her friends the other day and he did love lasagne or any free food for that matter. On the other hand he was a little nervous at how persistent these people were and that they seemed to think he was someone else. Maybe this was just the sort of thing people in London did when they were bored, or maybe they were going to sell him into some sort of sex slave ring. He decided to call Will, at least if he did go missing Will would be able to tell the police his evening plans.

Will answered on the eighth ring,

“Alright Merls, what can I do for you today?” he shouted over a lot of noise in the background, he was obviously at work.

“Hey Will, sorry to catch you at work but Gwen just rang me inviting me to dinner, what should I do?” he asked

Will was quiet for a bit,

“Will?”

“Uh… maybe you should go, it might do you some good Merlin,” he answered finally.

“What do you mean do me some good?” Merlin asked confused.

“Just might be good to meet new people,” he suggested

“But I’m a student I meet new people every day,” Merlin argued

“Well you’ll get a free meal, I’m sure they’re harmless,” Will reasoned.

“Why do you want me to go to dinner with them?” Merlin asked curiously

“Nevermind, look I’ve got to get back to work, ok?”

“Ok well if I don’t ring you tomorrow call the police ok?”

“Sure, talk to you later Merlin,” he said hanging up.

Will stared at his phone for a minute, before quietly saying,

“Because I want you to remember,” he whispered.

Merlin rang Gwen back, set on turning down her offer but when she answered she sounded so excited that he’d called her back that he didn’t want to disappoint her. That was how he ended up agreeing to go to her dinner party that night.

~

After struggling to decide what to wear for about an hour Merlin was ready to go. He’d decided on his regular t-shirt and jeans combo after changing several times. If they were so desperate to see him they shouldn’t care what he wore.

It took him forty minutes to walk to Knightsbridge and he was feeling fairly apprehensive as he stood outside Gwen’s block of flats. It looked very posh, he was stood with his finger over the buzzer hesitating.

“Don’t be intimidated my dear Merlin,” said Morgana behind him.

He turned around to see her standing there with a tall shaggy haired man.

“Ah glasses today Merlin?” she asked.

Merlin nodded cautiously.

“This is my boyfriend Leon, Leon this is Merlin,” she said.

Merlin didn’t reply he was too shocked, Morgana, Arthur, Gwen and now Leon this was too weird. And Gwen had said her boyfriend was Lance, Merlin was suspicious, but he shook his head to clear his thoughts. Morgana looked at Leon worriedly.

“Let’s go up shall we?” she asked quietly.

Merlin just stared for a moment longer, taking in Morgana’s face she looked just like his pictures he thought to himself, confused. But he turned round and pressed the buzzer, as the door to the block opened he couldn’t help feeling he was about to step through the looking glass. When they stepped out of the lift Merlin was amazed, he didn’t think he’d been anywhere so fancy before, he was about to inform Morgana of this when a voice interrupted his thoughts.

“Ah Merlin you came, excellent,” Arthur said.

Merlin turned round and got the shock of his life, Arthur was _Arthur, the Arthur_. He blinked owlishly at the blonde, his mouth hanging open.

“Merlin are you ok?” Arthur asked concerned.

“You’re Arthur,” Merlin breathed “ _My_ Arthur,” he said quietly.

“You remember me?” Arthur asked hopefully.

“No… what?” Merlin rubbed his face trying to calm down. “You can’t be… you’re not real… you’re just pretend…” he trailed off backing away from Arthur.

Arthur stepped forward.

“Merlin calm down,” he urged quietly.

Merlin ignored him, looking around the room at all the familiar faces, they were all here Morgana, Gwen and Leon.

“Gwaine? Lancelot?” he gasped when he saw them, “What the hell is going on?” he demanded.

“What do you think is going on?” Morgana asked softly.

“Someone is having a laugh at my expense and I don’t want any part of it,” he said turning to leave.

“Merlin wait,” Arthur said grabbing his arm.

Merlin shrugged him off and walked out of the flat.

“Well that went well,” Gwaine chipped in,

~

Merlin stormed into his flat and straight to his room, locking the door behind him. He was not in the mood for talking right now. He took a deep breath and knelt down beside his bed pulling out his old sketchbooks. Opening them and scattering them around the room he stared down, there was Arthur. He looked just like he had tonight, exactly the same. They were all there, the whole gang. But they were just his dreams how could they be real.

Merlin picked up one of his older books, it was fairly tattered now. He traced his finger over the silver lettering on the front which read _The Adventures of Arthur and Merlin._ He opened the book smiling at his old comic strips, he had been working on this for as long as he could remember. At first the dreams had been vague and patchy but in the last few years they had become so much more vivid and detailed. They even seemed to have an order to them. Last year he had started the comic again so that it flowed properly but he loved these old random ones still, they reminded of when he had started learning to draw properly, when he had realised that he wanted to be an artist.

There were six full books of comics now, and several more filled with random scenes from his dreams, he pulled out one of his favourites. It was a sketch of Arthur in chainmail sleeping by a campfire, he sighed. How could his dream Arthur look so similar to the Arthur he had met? It just didn’t make sense. He picked up his laptop deciding to look him up but he realised he didn’t know Arthur’s surname. He tried Arthur Pendragon as that was his name in the dreams and discovered that Arthur Pendragon was indeed a real man with a very real article in _The Telegraph._ Apparently he was the head of Camelot bank, one of the country’s oldest banks. Arthur had taken over from his father last year when Uther Pendragon had decided he was ready to retire.

Merlin didn’t sleep at all that night he just stayed up looking through his sketchbooks, trying to fight his confusion. He formulated a plan to sort out the mess he was in, on Monday he would go see Arthur at the bank, and tell him to leave him alone.

~

After a long day at work on no sleep at all Merlin managed to fall asleep before eleven. He slept through the night and woke up blearily to his alarm the next morning. After showering and dressing he filled his rucksack with as many sketchbooks he could fit and headed to the City. It was pouring down so he jumped on the northern line, he wasn’t in the mood for a two hour walk in the rain.

When he reached the bank he stormed up to the front desk.

“I’d like to speak to Arthur Pendragon please,” he said shortly.

The red-haired woman eyed him warily.

“Do you have an appointment?” she asked suspiciously.

“No,” Merlin answered curtly.

“Well I’m afraid you can’t just walk in here and expect to see him,” she informed him carefully.

“Look just tell him-”

“I am the front desk receptionist, I have no contact with Mr Pendragon,” she insisted.

“ _Look_ just get a message to him alright, tell him it’s Merlin. I’ll wait.” Merlin said before wandering over to the waiting area.

He sat down on one of the plush chairs and pulled out his current book. He was caught up in sketching the Darkling Wood, focussed on getting the lighting correct on the mysterious trees from his dreams. He liked the forest, he liked all forests. When he was younger he’d spent countless hours in the woods near his village. Being surrounded by trees always made him feel safe. It had been hard to move to London at first but he loved it now.

He was startled out of his reverie  when a shadow fell across the page, he looked up to see Percival standing before him, of course he was here too.

“Hello Merlin, I’ll take you to see Arthur now,” the large man said.

“Ok thank you Percival,” he said playing along.

Percival raised an eyebrow but didn’t comment. He led Merlin to the lift, taking him up to the top floor. Percival knocked on the door.

“Enter,” came Arthur’s voice from inside.

Percival nodded at Merlin then walked back to the lift. Merlin pushed the door open slowly and walked into the office. Arthur looked up at him, watching him carefully.

“You seemed to have calmed down,” he said slowly.

“You’re not real,” Merlin insisted.

“Why do you say that?” Arthur asked.

“Because I imagined you up,” Merlin informed him approaching the desk.

He opened his bag and emptied the contents over Arthur’s desk, ignoring all the paperwork on it.

“Merlin!” Arthur said crossly

“Look at them!” Merlin demanded, “Look at them! You can’t be real! You just can’t be…” he cried.

Arthur picked up the closest book and opened it slowly to reveal beautiful forest landscapes. He looked up at Merlin confused. Merlin waved his hand for him to continue looking. Arthur turned the page to see the image of himself dressed in chainmail. He was sat by a campfire next to a sleepy Merlin who was staring up at him fondly. Arthur gasped.

“I remember this,” he told Merlin.

“Stop it!” Merlin growled, “I drew this over a year ago, before I met you!” he said angrily.

Arthur sighed and went back to the books, smiling at the images.

“These are beautiful Merlin, you dream them don’t you?” he asked.

“Every night, and then I just have to draw them, it’s like it’s not enough for them to just be in my head. I have to make them more real,” Merlin explained quietly, “it’s like a compulsion, if I don’t draw them it drives me to distraction.”

“Hmm,” Arthur responded thinking, “Hey what’s this?”

He had come across _The Adventures of Arthur and Merlin_.

“This is lovely Merlin,” he said fondly stroking the images, “Gosh there are so many, have you ever thought about getting these published? They would make fantastic graphic novels, I bet they’d do really well,” Arthur promised.

“No.”

“No?”

“I used to think I would publish them, ages ago. But it’s not like my other art, I hide it away, it’s private. No one else sees it, it’s mine.” Merlin insisted.

“You’re showing me,” Arthur replied.

“You freaked me out. Imagine how I feel, imagine there was this guy, scratch that imagine there was this whole load of people you dreamt about and then they all turn up out of nowhere. It’s insane,” Merlin ranted.

“I never wanted to upset you Merlin,” Arthur said gently.

“You were my imaginary friend Arthur,” Merlin whispered.

Arthur smiled at him.

“I’m not crazy,” Merlin insisted.

“I know Merlin,” Arthur reassured him.

Merlin finally sat down at the desk rubbing his face and sighing. He looked at Arthur.

“Who are you?” he asked carefully.

Arthur pointed to the picture of him and Merlin stood atop a castle.

“Him,” he said simply.

“You can’t be,” Merlin whispered.

“You have dreams Merlin, I have memories,” Arthur said sadly.

“Memories?” Merlin asked watching him carefully.

“Ever since I was a child, I’ve had these memories of another life,” Arthur informed him.

“As King Arthur?”

“Yes,” Arthur said sincerely, scanning Merlin’s face, “You really don’t remember do you?” Arthur said, his face one of devastation.

Merlin didn’t know what to believe anymore, he shook his head.

“Sorry,” he whispered.

“All this,” Arthur gestured at the books spread over his desk, “all your dreams, they are real Merlin. Everyone else remembers, why can’t you?” Arthur begged.

“I don’t know, I’m sorry,” Merlin apologised.

“It’s not your fault,” Arthur sighed, “Do you still dream?” he asked.

“Every night, it’s happening in order now see?” Merlin opened up the newer _Adventures_ book, showing Arthur his new comics.

“It’s day by day now, obviously some days nothing happens, it’s just a quiet day in Camelot and I just doodle a few scenes, other days are epic adventures. This is where I’m up to,” he said.

He pointed at the scene, the image was of him fighting off the spirit of Cornelius Sigan.

“Gosh, this was so early on,” Arthur said slowly.

“How does it end then? Do you have me executed?” Merlin joked.

“Never!” Arthur growled, “I would never have let that happen,” he insisted.

“Ok, sorry,” Merlin replied calmly.

“It’s fine Merlin, I just wish you hadn’t had to be so afraid all the time,” Arthur said softly.

“Arthur it’s not real, it’s not. I don’t even have magic. I’m painfully normal,” he insisted.

“You’ll always be special to me Merlin,” Arthur said gently.

Merlin realised then why Arthur was clearly so desperate for him to remember. He cheeks coloured as images of the two of them sprang into his mind.  He shook his head trying to clear the thoughts before he did something stupid.

“I’m not him Arthur, I’m sorry but I’m not. I’m just a kid, I’m _eighteen_ Arthur. I’m a student I like video games, indie music, comic books and I work in a coffee shop. All we share is a name,” he stood up and gathered up the books.

“Merlin please-”

“I’m sorry Arthur, I’m sorry I don’t remember, I’m sorry I can’t be who you want me to be. I don’t know what to believe, I’d like to think you’re telling the truth but it’s so impossible Arthur, I just can’t. Please leave me alone,” he begged.

“Ok,” he said sadly “But please, take my number,” he handed over a post it note, “Just ring if you ever need anything; dinner, new glasses, art supplies, just a chat. Please just ring,”

“Ok,” Merlin said, knowing he never would.


	4. What Happens Next?

After his meeting with Arthur, things in Merlin’s life started to change for the worst. His dreams had started to become much darker and Merlin was struggling to handle it. The other day he had dreamt of his uncle being arrested and tortured by Aeridian. When he’d woken up he cried on the phone to his mother for over an hour before he calmed down.

He’d been so upset that his mum insisted that he came home for a week. He agreed that it would be good to get away from London for a while. His mum picked him up from the small train station and looked him over worriedly before pulling him into a tight embrace.

“Oh Merlin love, let’s get you home,” she’d said softly.

When they’d gotten home she took him into the lounge and sat him down.

“Merlin love what’s going on with you, what has you so upset?” she asked him.

“I met this guy mum,” he told her.

“Did he hurt you?” she said gripping his hand.

“No it’s not like that mum, no the guy was Arthur, you know Arthur from my dreams?” he asked.

“Ah,” she replied

“You knew didn’t you?” he accused “you fucking knew and you never said anything!” he yelled.

“Yes Merlin, I did. I’m sorry,” she’d whispered sadly.

He got up and stormed out of the house, he felt like he was going crazy. He went to see Will but he knew what to expect now. Will calmed him down, told him to stop overreacting and apologise to his mum. Then they talked then about everything that Will remembered, it wasn’t much as in his past life he’d never gone with Merlin to Camelot. They cried together when they talked of Will’s death, now that Merlin knew it was real it hurt all the more. Will held Merlin gently until he calmed down.

“You need to talk to Arthur Merlin,” he insisted.

“I can’t,” Merlin whispered.

“He’s probably the only one who can help you with this,” Will explained

“You hated him,” Merlin reminded him.

“I know but you loved him Merlin, I could see it when you came to Ealdor,” he said quietly.

“But that’s not me Will, that Merlin the wizard guy that isn’t me,” Merlin insisted.

“He is though, I know you don’t remember but you are the same, your just as kind, cheeky and wonderful. I don’t know why we all remember and you don’t but I promise you that you are Merlin,” Will told him.

“I can’t be who Arthur wants,” Merlin worried.

“Just give him a chance,” Will replied.

Merlin spent two weeks at home in the end, before returning to his hectic student life. When he got back to London he felt refreshed but he was still depressed, all his dreams were dark now. The night after he got back he dreamt of Freya’s death and ended up banging on her door at five am, petrified to what he might find. When she opened it he broke down sobbing and begging her to forgive him for not saving her.

“Hush Merlin it’s alright,” she insisted “You did save me, truly you did. And now in this life I’m free. Everything will be ok,” she comforted.

“But what if it’s not? what if it gets worse?” He cried.

She just looked at him sadly knowing what was still to come.

Merlin was failing his classes he was so distracted, he hadn’t drawn anything in a week because it was too painful. His room was covered in sketches that he’d ripped up. He lost his job at the coffee shop because he was so exhausted. He knew now that the dreams were real, he believed everything the others had told him and that made it so much worse.

When he poisoned Morgana and released the dragon he thought that it couldn’t possibly get any worse. He refused to sleep for four days, eventually collapsing from exhaustion. That night was when Merlin broke, he dreamt of his father, of his death. He woke up screaming, it was all too real, too much to bear. He scrambled for his phone and tried to call Will but there was no answer, it was the middle of the night. He couldn’t ring his mum at this hour she would worry.

He crawled over to his notice board and pulled down Arthur’s post-it note, he figured real life Arthur might be able to comfort him like his imaginary friend once did. He dialled the number and tried to calm his breathing whilst it rang.

“Hello,” said Arthur sleepily.

“Arthur…” Merlin croaked.

“Merlin what’s wrong?” Arthur asked.

But Merlin could only cry into the phone.

“Merlin are you in your flat?” Arthur asked clearly very worried.

“Yes,” Merlin whispered.

“Right I’m coming over,” Arthur told him before hanging up.

Thirty minutes later Merlin buzzed Arthur into the building. He led Arthur to his bedroom not wanting to disturb the others.

“Right Merlin what is going on?” Arthur asked taking in the state of Merlin’s room, all the half-finished and ripped sketches scattered all over the floor.

Merlin didn’t say anything, he just stepped forward and fell into Arthurs arms. Arthur lowered them both to the floor and held Merlin until he was calm enough to speak.

“It’s all going wrong Arthur, Gaius was tortured and I killed Morgana, and Freya.. and my father Arthur, my father…” he choked.

“Hush Merlin, hush it’s alright, it’s ok,” Arthur whispered

“What happens next Arthur? Who’s next? Please I have to know,” Merlin begged.

“It will get better Merlin I promise you, it’ll be hard and more bad things will happen but I promise you it gets better. I’ll be here for you Merlin, here in real life. I am Arthur Merlin, I am your imaginary friend, I am your king, and I will help you through this I swear,” Arthur promised.

“But the stories say you die,” Merlin worried.

“Everyone dies Merlin, but we’re here again now,” he told him, “The stories got a lot wrong though, I suppose you’ll have to wait and see.”

Merlin smiled against Arthur’s shoulder.

“Why do we have these memories? The dreams?” he asked.

“We are reincarnations Merlin,” Arthur explained.

“But why?”

“I don’t know, at first I thought we has some great purpose like the old stories but now I think, I hope that this time it is just for us. No magic, no dragons, just us living our lives,” Arthur suggested.

“I like that idea, magic would be nice though,” he said.

Arthur laughed and picked up Merlin’s unfinished painting of Freya in the boat.

“This is almost magic Merlin, it’s so beautiful,” Arthur said awed by the detail on the page.

“Thank you,” Merlin whispered, “I’ve known you my whole life Arthur.”

Arthur shifted Merlin in his lap.

“And I’ve known you,” he turned Merlin’s face toward his and kissed his lips tentatively, “I’ve been waiting for you since I was eight years old. I knew I’d find you again my little warlock.”

“Uh less of the little Arthur, I’m taller than you!” Merlin teased

“Yes but you’re as skinny as a rat Merlin!” Arthur retorted.

“Well at least I’m not-”

Arthur interrupted him with another kiss, not wanting to hear any insults about his weight. Merlin kissed him back with vigour this time, pushing Arthur back against the wall and opening his mouth to breath Arthur in. Arthur responded enthusiastically, deepening the kiss, tasting Merlin again after all these years. He ran his hands over Merlin’s slight frame desperate to feel his lover again. He pushed his hand under Merlin’s pyjama top, needing to feel skin. Merlin’s hands were fisted in Arthurs shirt, clinging tightly. His hips were moving against Arthur’s legs and he groaned into Arthur mouth. This was all so new but so familiar at the same time. He pulled back gasping for breath.

“Arthur,” he warned.

But Arthur just moved onto Merlin’s neck, sucking little bruises onto his pale skin. It was too much for Merlin, he couldn’t hold on.

“Shit Arthur,” he gasped.

Arthur grinned into Merlin’s shoulder and stroked his hair while Merlin tried to steady his breathing.

“Horny student,” he mumbled against Merlin’s skin.

“Shit,” Merlin said again when he finally opened his eyes, “sorry,” he mumbled.

Arthur laughed gently,

“I was a teenager once Merlin,” he smiled.

“Ten years ago?” Merlin joked.

“Ha ha, I’m twenty-six Merlin,” he laughed.

Merlin grinned cheekily at him and pressed his head against Arthurs forehead.

“That was… brilliant,” he breathed.

“I’ll presume from that statement that you’ve never actually had sex?” Arthur enquired.

“Nope, I’m a nerdy kid from a tiny Welsh village,” he explained.

“Ah but nerds are sexy now Merlin so what’s your excuse?” Arthur teased.

“Um… I was waiting for the right person… the man of my dreams,” he said grinning.

Arthur laughed loudly at this, throwing his head back.

“Well you’ve found him now,” Arthur said happily.

“I guess I have,” Merlin said equally happy, knowing that everything would be alright.


End file.
